Laughter

I was taught that sleep, music, nature, humor (laughter), and the Bible are 5 things that relax and invigorate us.  They calm and uplift us.  They encourage and restore.

Sleep obviously relaxes and restores our energy.  That’s a no-brainer.  Music and nature both evoke emotions that can calm and uplift.  We’ve all probably experienced that.  The Bible is full of edification, exhortation, and comfort.  And of course, is the best source for all these things.  But what about humor?  Have you ever thought to yourself that you could use a good laugh?  Have you found yourself yearning for a “laugh ‘til you cry” kind of laughter?   Sometimes you might even think, “When was the last time I laughed?”  We actually need to laugh from time to time.

The internet is full of information about the emotional and physical benefits of laughter.  Here’s a statement I read online:

Laughter enhances your intake of oxygen-rich air, stimulates your heart, lungs, and muscles, and increases the endorphins that are released by your brain, which activate and relieve your stress response. A rollicking laugh fires up and then cools down your stress response, and it can increase and then decrease your heart rate and blood pressure.

Even if we agree that laughter is beneficial, it sometimes eludes us.  (We all know that there are times in life when we cannot laugh and times when laughter is not appropriate.  I’m not referring to those times at all in this blog.)  But there are times when we are stuck in the doldrums, or feel down because of everyday stresses or worldly pressures.  These are the times when laughter can relax and invigorate us.

When I’m in the doldrums or down hearted, I will often seek comical relief – maybe a favorite funny movie.  Finding entertainment (movies, TV, stand-up comedy, books, etc.) that makes us laugh is a welcomed diversion to get our minds off our troubles.  Everyone’s sense of humor is different, but for me a good slapstick works every time… 

The scene is Inspector Jacques Clouseau, a dog, and a man.  Inspector Clouseau, with his almost unintelligible French accent: “Does your dog bite?”  The man: “No.”  The Inspector reaches to pet the dog, which bites him.  The Inspector: “I thought you said you dog does not bite.”  The man: “That’s not my dog.” 

Knowing movie lines that we can quote, or scenes we can replay in our minds, often makes us chuckle.  Those can be quick ‘pick-me-ups’ when we need them.  Of course this isn’t limited to movies.  Many favorite quotes can come from stand-up comics, sitcoms, or books.  Remembering these can lighten our mood.  Sometimes just talking about a favorite comedy triggers our laughter.  Or just saying a comedian’s name can bring amusing thoughts to mind.

Of course humor is found in more than just Hollywood entertainment.  We can have funny conversations with friends and family about silly things that happen.  We can recap a funny memory, especially with those who share it.  We can quip back and forth with witty retorts or banter.  We can tell a joke.  We can laugh at ourselves. And we can laugh about our common quirks.  How about playing a game?  Board games or card games can many times result in uproarious laughter.  Guessing games like Charades can also be very amusing.  One of the times I laughed the longest and hardest was watching my sons dancing to a video game.  All of these episodes of laughter invigorate us.  Any of them can help us feel uplifted or restored. 

Think about tickling.  Why do we tickle our kids?  To make them laugh.  (however, it might cause the opposite effect on adults, so use sparingly.)  Why do we want our kids to laugh?  Because to us their laughter equates to their happiness.  Silly things like tickling or pretend-chasing delight children and thus delight us.  When my grandchildren were younger, I would pretend-chase them in a circle around the couch and coffee table.  I would use very exaggerated arm swings and steps, but still be unable to catch them for several laps around the couch, all the while they laughed with glee.  Then I would stop suddenly and turn around toward them, which would cause screams of laughter and the chase would then proceed in the opposite direction.  This would continue until I ran out of steam, usually to their dismay.  Those are special memories that bring a smile to my face.  There is nothing like the sound of children’s laughter to delight our hearts! 

But that delight isn’t limited to our kids, how about times when you make an adult laugh?  Isn’t that delightful?  Yes, because really, aren’t we our happiest when those around us (especially family) are happy?  Humor can be an avenue toward those happy feelings for both parties.  One of my favorite things is making my husband laugh.  It’s not an easy task.  So when I succeed, it’s a great victory – very satisfying! 

A word of caution, however…  As previously noted, laughter should have positive qualities.  Teasing, pranks and practical jokes may seem funny to you, but may not be funny to the recipient.  Laughter in these situations might not meet that positive criteria.  Of course that doesn’t make all teasing, pranks, or practical jokes bad.  I’ve seen some pranks that were downright hilarious.  Just make sure the recipient is laughing too.  And never laugh at someone’s expense or make fun of someone.  Laughter in those situations is hurtful.  But I think we all know that. 

At any given time, the world can be an unhappy place with a myriad of stress producing circumstances.  If we find ourselves in the rough seas of worldly pressures, we can use these relaxing and invigorating tools to navigate our way through.  Without any doubt, the Bible offers our best defense against the pressures of life.  (It offers our best offense too!)  But laughter can be an acceptable “cure to what ails you”.  It can aid us in our maintaining a positive attitude and diverting our attention away from the negatives we’re facing.  And as doctors and scientists agree, it can benefit our health.  

So take a moment to think of something funny.  Giggle, chuckle, snicker, hoot, cackle, guffaw or just plain smile.  Try it and see if it doesn’t make you feel just a little better.  😊

Proverbs 17:22

A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones.

Note to my readers:  I love you!  Thanks for laughing!

“Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence in society.”
—Mark Twain.

Ted Striker: “Surely you can’t be serious.”
Dr. Rumack: “I am serious. And don’t call me Shirley”
—Ted Striker (Robert Hays) and Dr. Rumack (Leslie Nielsen), Airplane!

Tenderness

Having lived my whole life (until recently) up north, I am well acquainted with cabin fever.  For those of you who grew up in the south, cabin fever is the state of mind caused by perpetually being cooped up during the cold and icy weather of winter.  It is a yearning for springtime. 

Remembering cabin fever made me think of why we yearn for spring.  Obviously, we want the return of warmer weather so we can go outside without being cold down to our bones.  And we want to not worry about icy streets and sidewalks.  But more than that, we delight in the rebirth that spring offers.  Barren fields, leafless trees and empty gardens suddenly abound with new life.  The dominant grey shades of winter become a lively green.  Flowers blossom before our eyes with their colorful beauty; and their fragrance fills the air that has finally thawed from winter’s freeze.  The creatures that winter silenced awaken to fill our ears with song and voice.  And the days get longer to satisfy our hearts with glorious sunshine.  All of this new life arouses our nurturing souls.

The Bible often refers to youth and new growth as tender.  And really, isn’t that how we view the burgeoning spring?  Those tender leaves that push their way through the soil to become lovely tulips and the tender buds that appear on the trees elicit our care, concern, and appreciation.  And after the solitude of winter, we are anxious to provide those things.  Think about baby birds in their nest or a litter of puppies, pretty much anything (maybe not snakes or bugs) in a newly born state evokes our tender compassions.  So, I guess we could conclude that tender things not only require tender care, but also encourage it. 

Of course, this also applies to people.  Although, the arrival of our babies is not limited to springtime, newborns require very tender care.  And it is not a difficult decision for us to provide that.  But somewhere along the line, youth matures.  What then?  Is our tenderness no longer needed?  Do we stop tending our gardens when they are fully grown?  No.  Being tender toward adults may not seem necessary because we don’t perceive them as being tender like youth, but often the adults that don’t appear to need our tenderness, require it the most.  

Think of all the people who are trapped in the endless cold-hearted winter of the world.  The tenderness you show might be the only kindness they see.  How about the people who are hopelessly lost?  Your tenderness could give them direction.  What if a friend or family member is irritable because they are having a bad day?  Responding to them with tenderness could change everything (and maybe prevent a fight).

Being tender means that we are considerate, gentle, kind, and compassionate.  It also carries the connotation of being adoring, affectionate and devoted.  It is the particular relationship that determines the level of these.  Obviously, we are more devoted to our families than to strangers, however we can be kind to anyone.  We are affectionate to those in our inner circles, but we can have compassion on a broad scale. 

The Bible, in the book of Ephesians, instructs us to be tenderhearted.  We are to have compassion one toward another and be kind.  This is necessary to combat the hardheartedness of the world.  Too often the world spits out criticism instead of compassion.  Failures are mocked, while successes go unnoticed.  The modus operandi of society generally is to tear people down rather than build them up.  We can step in with compassion for those people who are hurting.  We can show them kindness, gentleness, and tenderness.  Think of what that would do for their hearts! 

Also tied up in being tenderhearted is forgiveness.  I think that this is a critical element in our families (both physical and spiritual) and with our friends.  People are not perfect, so it’s bound to happen that someone hurts us in some manner at some point.  Harboring resentment instead of forgiveness will not only cause the hurt to fester, but also cause separation between us. Both are painful.  But forgiveness covers and mends.  Isn’t that a better way to live?  The standard for forgiveness according to Ephesians is “as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”  Remembering all the things that God forgave us for, will help us to forgive others.  And recognizing our own imperfection will help us to not demand that from others. 

I think we all would agree that the quality of being tenderhearted is a good thing.  The world might say we’re weak, but we know that the strongest man that ever lived, Jesus Christ, was tenderhearted.  The world might say that it’s an outdated concept.  But we know that the things of God are eternal.  The world might say that we’re crazy.  But seriously, has that ever stopped us?  Moving ahead with compassion, being ready to help, serve and bless everyone will open the doors for God’s blessings on us.  Giving equals receiving.  Try it and see for yourself what the benefits are of being tenderhearted. 

And even though springtime only comes once a year, we can have our own spring-like rejuvenation every day.  When we look at our surroundings with nurturing eyes, we will be awakened to provide tender care, kindness, and compassion.  We will see spring-like flourishing, and the cessation of cold-hearted winter for others and for ourselves. 

Note to my readers:  You touch my heart! 

Plans and Outcomes

“The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry”.  This is an adage my mom used regularly.  It is from a poem by the famous Scottish author, Robert Burns.  I later shortened it to simply, “The best laid plans…”, which I still say today.  In the poem and in general usage, the statement means that your plans don’t always work out the way you want them to.

A change of plans is a common occurrence in our lives.  Sometimes it’s minor, dinner at 8 instead of 7.  Sometimes it’s disappointing, we don’t get that job we wanted.  And sometimes it’s catastrophic and changes everything.  I’ve learned over the years that change isn’t necessarily a bad thing.  That disappointments can lead to better things.  And at the times when life deals us a low blow, we can still steer ourselves toward a positive outcome, even though it’s not exactly what we had planned.  There is no doubt that life can throw us some serious curve balls or knock-out punches.  But even if we are down for the count, we can get up to fight another day. 

When you were a kid, did people ask you what you wanted to be when you grew up?  Think back to your youthful aspirations.  What did you want to be?  I wanted to be a ballerina.  I wanted to wear a tutu and glide across the stage like a butterfly.  However, I did not become a ballerina.  Mostly because I really didn’t have the aptitude to be a dancer, but also because my mom wanted me to learn to play the organ.  I did not want to play the organ, so consequently I’m not a musician either.  All of this to say that both of these best laid plans went awry.  Did that ruin my life?  No.  Do I have regrets?  No. I might have thought, “what if…” from time to time, but I don’t regret not doing those things because I know that I really didn’t have the talent to be a ballerina.  And since I didn’t want to be an organist, I didn’t put forth the effort to become one.  We cannot regret not having something that we were not willing to work hard enough to obtain.  Childhood plans often do not come to pass, and usually we accept that, or even expect it.  If you are living your childhood aspiration, more power to you!  But for the rest of us, most likely, we have moved on.

Later in high school, I wanted to be a research scientist. This was something for which I was well-suited and something that I was more than willing to work for.  I was all set to go to college to pursue that plan, but circumstances hindered me.  These were not bad circumstances, but they changed my trajectory.   Here again the best laid plans didn’t happen, but the results were good, just not what I had intended.  At these times, we usually find ourselves immersed in the new path that our life is taking, and the old plans tend to fade away.  Regrets?  No.  “What if…”?  Maybe some.

Fast forward a decade or so and my life’s course was set.  I was in the place that I assumed I would always be, and I was content.  Then an unforeseen event changed everything.  This was a painful and devasting event that destroyed my plans.  These situations require us to regroup and make new plans. We cannot afford to wallow in the loss of the old ones.  We must be determined to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off and move forward the best that we can.  It’s not an easy thing to do, and often we have to start with baby steps, but as our resolve keeps us moving, we may find that our latter end can be better than our beginning.

Fast forward a few more decades and here I am.  My life has been full of plans that didn’t work out the way I wanted them to, for one reason or another.  There have been devastating experiences and big disappointments.   But what I have learned from the sad or difficult times has made me a better person and has taught me to appreciate all the good times that my life has offered.  I am thankful for all the twists and turns and changes of plans that my life has taken to bring me to where I am today because I am blessed. 

I think of it like this…

Our lives are a compilation of all the good and all the bad that we’ve experienced.  We use what we have learned to weave all those experiences into a colorful tapestry that is uniquely ours (it’s an ongoing process).  All the successes and all the failures, all the joy and all the heartache, all the laughter and all the tears, all the plans that worked and all that didn’t are intricately woven together and contribute to the design of our tapestry.  Things like regrets, bitterness and resentments tear holes in our tapestry and cause it to fray.  We need to avoid those things to preserve the fabric’s strength.   And things like faith, hope and love enhance the quality of our tapestry.  They can also repair any damage done.  So why not enjoy making your tapestry?  It’s the only one you’re going to have in this lifetime.  Why not weave all your experiences into a beautiful work of art that you can be proud of?  With the help of the master-weaver, God, our tapestry can be a glorious reflection of His goodness and kindness. 

That’s a worthy goal, right?

Another reason that my life is so blessed is because of the people that have been and now are in it.  When I consider all the directions that my life has taken, whether planned or unplanned, I am thankful for the paths that I’ve crossed of wonderful people who have helped me, taught me, enriched me, and loved me.  People who showed great strength in the face of cruel adversity helped me learn to be brave.  People who went the extra-mile to help someone in need encouraged me to be caring.  People who found positives in a negative world taught me to be optimistic.  And the list goes on.  Even the people who were hurtful benefited me because they convinced me to be kind.  I sometimes feel like I’m the most blessed person in the world today because I’m surrounded by a wonderful family and terrific friends.  Their love and support have taught me so many things.  My life would be empty without them.

So throughout our lives, plans may go awry, but that doesn’t mean we should stop making plans.  Life would be pretty chaotic without any plans!  So let’s make our plans, start moving toward our goals and if life gives you lemons, make lemonade.  Learn to roll with the punches, and if you get knocked down, get back up and keep on trucking.  And enjoy making the beautiful tapestry that is your life.

And one last thing, the best outcomes happen with God’s help, and His plans NEVER go awry. 

Note to my readers:  You’re the best!  Thank you for being a part of my life. 

You Are Important

We live in a society that has forgotten the importance of the individual.  Consequently, we may feel like just another face in the crowd, a number on a list, or even irrelevant.  We may think that we can’t make a difference.  But we can! 

I picture society like a king-size bedspread.  If a thread were removed, it wouldn’t be noticeable when viewing the whole bedspread from a distance.  But if you took a magnifying glass to the spot where the thread was missing, it would become more apparent.  And if you looked at it with a microscope, there would be a gaping hole.  So it is with our lives.  From a distance looking at the whole scene of society, we may not realize our importance.  But closer examination reveals the necessity of our presence.  And the closest scrutiny shows what our absence would really mean.  

We don’t live our lives according to some vague script written by a thoughtless society.  The story of our lives is uniquely scripted for us as individuals.  The characters in our life’s story are real people with real-life situations, just like us.  All of us live our lives on a personal level with our own experiences and our own contributions.  It is in this personal environment that we have the opportunities to utilize our distinct talents, to make our special contributions, and to demonstrate our importance.  We are not merely actors on a stage for the audience of society.

We start life in the embrace of our family.  It is in this particular environment that we learn the basics of how to live life.  It is where we build the foundation of our character and begin to recognize our worth.  It is our family who first influences our decisions and our behavior.  Family ties make us important.    

As we grow up, we reach out to include others in our lives.  For instance, we make friends.  These “outsiders” provide companionship and support when we’re away from the comfort of our family environment.  Friends offer new perspectives and additional experiences that further influence our decisions and behavior.  It is in this environment that we encounter new dimensions in our relationships.  It is where we find more people to care for and who care for us.  Our importance expands. 

And somewhere in the midst of living our lives, we might get saved.  If we do, we become part of a greater, yet still individual story.  We become part of a bigger family – the family of God.  And it is the truth of God’s Word that begins to govern our decisions and behavior.  It is in this environment that the greatest love is shared, and the most forgiveness is felt.  It is where friends become family and family becomes closer.  In this environment, our importance expands exponentially. 

You see, what society thinks doesn’t really matter, because our importance is derived from those who think we’re important.  I will explain.  In the natural family bond for example, children are important to their parents and parents are important to their children.  It’s axiomatic and reciprocal.  How important is your child to you?   By answering that question, you have not only determined your child’s importance, but have also defined your own.  And, as a child knowing that you are so important to your parents, how do you feel about yourself?  Important, right?   Think about friendships, are your friends important to you?  By making your friends important to you, you have also made yourself important to them.   And as children in God’s family, we are infinitely important to God.  Consider what that says about our own importance…

Living in these personal environments of our lives, doesn’t need to limit our sphere of influence.  As individuals, we can effect change on a broad scale when we are fully committed to our cause.  We as individuals can touch someone’s life – we can teach them, help them, bless them, love them.  Then that individual does the same for someone else, who does the same for another, and so on.  Then before we know it, change happens. 

Never underestimate how important you are and how much your life means to your family, to your friends and to God.  I think this poem says it best.  YOU make a difference!

One Man Awake

One man awake awakens another,
The second awakens his next door neighbor,
And three awake can rouse the town,
And turn the whole place upside down.
And many awake can raise such a fuss,
That it finally awakens the rest of us.
One man up with dawn in his eyes – multiplies.

By Helen Kromer

Note to my readers:  You are important to me!  I am thankful for each and every one of you and I pray for you.  I hope this journey is as enjoyable for you as it is for me.  I have decided not to go “public” with my blog.  I don’t want my page to become cluttered with a million ads (not much fresh air in that!) and I want to continue to write on a personal level, which may not appeal to the masses anyway.  So, if you know someone that you think would like to visit with me each week, please spread the word. ( terrileewritings.com )

Many thanks!