Month: March 2023

If you read my previous post regarding the puppy, you may remember I promised that I would update the status of the situation in a couple of months.  So here goes. 

The biggest learning curve for me has been learning to change my mind.  This adventure was not my idea, and all my objections were overruled.  So, I needed to change my mind, accept the situation and make it work. Sometimes we can find ourselves in situations that we cannot prevent or change, and our only choice is to change is our thinking.  I doubt that I am the only person who finds it difficult to change my mind at times, so maybe you can relate to how hard this has been for me.   

The first step in changing our minds is to replace the old thoughts with new thoughts.  So instead of thinking how much I did NOT want to raise a puppy at this time, I had to start thinking, what could I do to raise a good puppy?  I replaced resentful thoughts with charitable ones.  And I sought to find positives that I could keep in my mind.  (She is really cute!)  However, it is still a work in progress!

A puppy is a full-time responsibility and affects everything in your life in some way.  So, besides remembering to pray a lot, the next thing I needed to learn was how to fit the puppy into my lifestyle – and not to fit me into the puppy’s lifestyle.  This meant that I had to continue with my daily routine and not cater to the puppy’s whims.  Oh, I have to stop what I’m doing and take her outside to “get busy” from time to time, but for the most part, I do everything I need to do, and she naps or follows me around.  But I must always keep an awareness of what she is doing because if she is left unsupervised for a time, she might be chewing the furniture, eating a towel or trying to dig a hole in the wood floor.  (All of which, she has tried at least once.)

I do need to walk her, but that is as good for me as it is for her.  I am meeting more neighbors and getting some more exercise.  She loves her walks, but she is afraid of big dogs, and there have been occasions that I had to carry her because of that. 

We taught her to ring the sleigh bells on the door handle when she needs to go out and “get busy”, but she has learned that she can ring the bells whenever she just wants to go outside and play.  She is readily obedient – when it suits her!  She thinks it’s great fun to run away from us when we are trying to catch her, and she often does not come when she is called.  She thinks everyone is her playmate and jumping on them is part of the game.  She loves to eat grass, leaves, sticks, rocks, dirt, Spanish moss, you name it.  She barks like crazy whenever one of us leaves the house, or when she is trying to get her way.  The trainer told us to ignore her when she barks like that.  And that we should even turn our backs to her, because that would hurt her feelings and she wouldn’t like that. 

Late one afternoon, while I was preparing dinner, I wouldn’t give her what I was making, and she started barking.  So, I turned my back toward her.  Then she ran around to where I was facing and barked more.  And I turned away from her again and she ran to my front again.  This happened two more times before she finally stopped barking.  (there has never been a question that she is smart!)  It only takes a couple turns now before she stops barking.  I will add to my story that even the trainer was amazed at how loud and shrill her bark is. It gives new meaning to the term, ‘piercing your ears’!

She still has much learning to do and so do we.  We can’t give in and allow her to misbehave, and we can’t expect her to behave without being trained.  So, the work continues.  The next step in changing my mind has been to keep my eyes on the goal.  I remind myself that repetition is a key to learning.  And both the puppy and I are still learning.  I cannot slack off in my training efforts and I cannot get angry when she doesn’t obey.  Learning often doesn’t pay off right away but the fruit becomes apparent in time.  Eyes on the goal!  Time spent now will pay off later! 

And like I said in my previous post, I like dogs as much as the next person, and there are times that I just love having the puppy around.  She is cute, playful and smart.  I remind myself to stay focused on her good qualities.  I mean really isn’t that the way we successfully change our minds?  Focus on the positives and refute the negatives.  And I know that once these few wrong behaviors are corrected, she will become a nice addition to our lives. 

The last part of changing my mind is to believe that I can do this.  I know that the puppy is here to stay.  So, the only option I have is to make the situation the best it can be.  I must accept the extra effort involved in training and caring for a puppy and make it as much a part of my daily routine as cooking and cleaning.  I don’t fight doing those things, they are “just what I do”.  And being a dog owner has to become, “just what I do” too. 

The Bible talks about us being transformed by the renewing of our minds.  (Romans 12:2)  Renewing the mind is basically changing your thoughts.  Biblically it is replacing worldly thoughts with Godly thoughts.  When we do that, we will be transformed like a caterpillar changes into a beautiful butterfly. 

In practical application, we can use that principle to change our thinking from negative thoughts to positive ones; like from “I don’t want a dog right now” into “I’m going to do what it takes to have the best dog ever.”  Change is seldom instantaneous.  More often than not, it is the result of a faithful effort to embrace new thoughts.  It is accomplished by repeatedly refuting the undesirable information and replacing it with the information that we want to have.  And the process takes time.    

So, the puppy and I are figuring each other out.  She is learning that we are both happier when she does what she is supposed to do.  And she is learning to behave so that she is not a constant burden.  I am learning to be more patient and to accept my new role as a puppy parent.  With God’s continual help, I can do this!  And so can she.

Note to my readers:  To all of you who just love, love, love your dogs, I look forward to being one of you.  Thanks for reading. 

I’ve been thinking… It is easy to do the things that we WANT to do.  Now, you may be thinking, “Wow, Terri, that is a profound statement – not.”   And I would agree.  But let’s explore this a bit further. 

Consider… Do you want to eat?  With few exceptions, the answer is probably yes.  Does anyone need to twist your arm to make you eat?   Unless you are a small child, it usually doesn’t take much coercion for us to sit down to a good meal.  It’s easy to eat because we want to do it.  And one reason that we want to do it is because we like to do it.  (In fact, some of us may really like to eat.  So eating is too easy to do!)  Not eating on the other hand, is often not what we want to do, so it takes more effort.  Hence, dieting can be difficult. 

We all have things that we need to do whether we want to or not.  Chores or activities that are necessary to maintain our lifestyle cannot go undone.  Part of growing up is learning how to do those things.  Do we like to do all those things?  Probably not.  So consequently, we might tend to do the things that we want to do because we like doing those things.  And we may struggle to do the things that we don’t want to do because we don’t like doing those.  For instance, I hate washing the floors.  I procrastinate doing that chore as long as I can.  It isn’t easy for me to wash the floors because I don’t want to do it.  On the other hand, I love to rearrange my nick-nacks.  I do that all the time because I want to. 

Think about our jobs.  Whether we are gainfully employed or work at other endeavors, we all have work to do.  Do we want to do it?  Probably yes and no.  I was blessed because I liked all my jobs.  It wasn’t hard to get up every morning and go into the office because I wanted to.  My husband, however, has had a few jobs that he did not like.  It was not easy for him to go to work because the environment was so stressful.  And nobody wants to put themselves in a stressful situation. 

What about our relationships, especially with family and friends?  Our wellbeing is enriched by those relationships.  When our relationships flourish, we flourish.  So, how do relationships flourish?  By working at them.  When a relationship is brand new, people often WANT to make it work.  It is easy for them to put forth the effort to develop the relationship because that is what they want to do.  Unfortunately, in the long-term, people can become complacent and no longer want to work at a relationship. Since that work is no longer easy, the effort might wane, and the relationship gradually becomes hollow.  (Our relationship with God can also fall prey to our lack of effort if we are not careful.)

In all these examples I think we can see that it is easy to do the things that we WANT to do and it more difficult to do the things that we don’t want to do.  However, there are many things in life that we must do regardless of whether we want to or not.  So, what’s the answer?

Well, the simple answer is to learn to want to do those things that we don’t like.  Ok. How?

Of course, the first key to our success is asking for God’s help.  The Bible promises that when we seek God first, He will supply what we need.  (Matthew 6:33)  We will never be poorer for keeping God first in our hearts and minds.  He can guide our steps through any situation.  And He can help us master the responsibilities that we do not like to do.  Doesn’t it make sense that we are stronger with God’s help than we are without it?

In all my years of washing floors, I’ve never learned to like doing it.  BUT I have learned that I like clean floors!  When I keep my eyes on that goal, I want to wash my floors.  So, the next key is being goal oriented.  Goals are things that we WANT to achieve.  If our focus remains on the goal and not on the task of getting to it, we will be more apt to want to complete the work. 

In the case of stressful situations, sometimes we cannot avoid those.  The world can be a crummy place.  Some people think that they just need to ‘accept’ these kinds of situations as part of life.  I disagree.  We may not be able to control every situation in our lives, but we do not need to ‘accept’ the negatives.  Instead, we refute them.  In the case of my husband’s unnecessarily stressful jobs, he steeled his resolve and did what he needed to do until he could remedy the situation by getting a new job.  So, another key is recognizing that, “this too shall pass.”  We don’t give in or give up; we work through negative situations until we achieve the success that we want. 

Relationships can be a little trickier because they involve another person, who also has free will.  We cannot make others think like we do or behave in a certain way.  We can communicate the thoughts of our hearts to them, but what they do with that information is up to them.  In an unselfish relationship, each person wants to bless the other, so their actions are aimed in that direction.  Selfishness is almost always at the root of a struggling relationship.  So, we can add unselfishness to our list of keys.

A friend shared this saying with me, “Your energy flows where your attention goes.”  So, it seems to me that if we put our attention in the right place, our energy will lead us to success in that endeavor.   And success breeds success. 

This indeed only scratches the surface of things we can do to help ourselves accomplish the things that we WANT in our lives.  By seeking God first, focusing on our goals, fighting through the hard times, and being unselfish, we can open the doors to a successful life of doing the things we like and liking the things we do. 

Note to my readers:  Thank you for wanting to read my blog! 

Well, it happened again.  Another birthday!  Why do birthdays come more frequently now that I’m older than they did when I was a kid?  I remember there being an eternity between birthdays as a child.  And nowadays, every time I turn around, another birthday has come and gone! 

I did a lot of reflecting on my birthday this year. Not about age, but about friends.  I will explain…

I received more greetings for my birthday this year than I remember receiving before.  Perhaps, I just appreciated them more than I ever have. Whichever…  I am not only thankful for the wonderful people who took their time to think of me on my birthday, but also humbled that they thought I warranted such remembrance.

So, I began to really think about my friends.  They are the most remarkable people!  I am proud to call them my friends (and my family).    Each one of them is unique in their own special way.  Each one adds something amazing to my life.  And I am the better for knowing all of them. 

My friends are very talented.  They are artists, musicians, writers, teachers, crafters, decorators, public speakers, health care and other industry professionals, mothers, fathers, dancers, designers, financial whizzes, chefs, and just plain smart!  I can genuinely say that I admire each one of them for their particular skills. 

In addition to their talents, my friends exhibit outstanding qualities.  They are kind, considerate, trustworthy, honest, clever, funny, bright, compassionate, strong, bold, generous, faithful, patient, industrious, uplifting, and supportive. They all embrace a positive attitude.

My friends help me, teach me, inspire me, console me, and correct me when I’m wrong (which might be more often than I care to admit).  They always manage to be there for me when I need them.  My heart thrills just hearing their voices. We laugh together often and cry together sometimes.  We rejoice in each other’s victories and share each other’s sorrows.  We love spending time together even though distance may impede our frequency.  But we know that someday that will change, and we will never have to miss each other again.

Best of all, my friends love God.  That is the biggest tie that binds us.  We share common beliefs on the most important things in life.  We endeavor to live by Biblical principles.  We love each other with God’s love.

So, to all my friends, God bless you and thank you for being my friend.  Our connection is so very important to me.  When life becomes a roller coaster, we’ll ride it together.  When the sun rises over a placid ocean, we’ll watch it together.  And when the dark night encroaches, we’ll hold each other’s hands.  We are in this thing together.  We have each other’s backs.  I am more thankful than you can imagine having you in my life.  And I yearn to be the kind of friend to you that you are to me.  I love you!! 

Note to my readers:    You are remarkable!!  ♥ Thanks for reading!