Category: General Writing

I have been thinking about the term “status quo”.  I use the term regularly.  The dictionary defines status quo as “the existing state of affairs”.  It further calls it “normalcy”.  I began to wonder, what does that really mean?  Afterall, normalcy for me is likely quite different than normalcy for you.  And doesn’t “the existing state of affairs” always fluctuate in our lives?  So, status quo must be subjective.   It is.  It’s not the same for everyone.  The condition of status quo varies from person to person; however its connotation indicates that something is commonplace in one’s life.

Overall to me, status quo conveys even keel, or routine.  But what if my status quo was based on something else?   What if status quo for me was deliriously happy?  Why couldn’t that be normalcy for my life?  Or maybe the times when peace floods my soul should be my status quo?  Whatever we call status quo in our lives is our most common condition.  So let’s make that common condition something we really want to have. 

Let’s think through this…  Okay, we’ll use happy for our example.  (we’ll save deliriously happy for special occasions.)  If we decide that we want happy to be the status quo in our lives, we are saying that we want happy to be our most common condition.  In order to accomplish this, we must first define happy for ourselves.  Maybe it’s being able to smile and laugh, or maybe it’s feeling lighthearted and not feeling worried.  It would be different for everyone.  Then we have to determine what makes us happy.  Maybe it’s being with family or friends.  Maybe it’s reading our Bible.  Maybe it’s walking in nature.  Maybe it’s helping people.  There could be a million things that make us happy.  (I will interject here that the greatest source of happiness that I know is God’s Word.)  (Just sayin’)

So, once we’ve defined happy and determined what makes us happy, we can begin to pursue it.  For example, being with my family makes me happy, but they live far away.  So I could be unhappy because I can’t see them, or I could call them, which would make me happy.  Maybe they’re too busy to talk for a long time, I could feel bad about the brevity of the call, or I could be happy just hearing their voice.  Maybe I could take a moment and pray for them and that would make me feel close to them – and happy! 

You see, we can’t always control circumstances, but we can decide how we’ll respond to them.  So if we are determined to be happy, we may need to change the way we look at some things and how we react.  Like, I see people who seem to have the attitude, “that the grass is always greener on the other side”.  They are usually unhappy.  But if they could learn to see that their grass is the greenest, then they would be much happier.  We must direct our thinking toward our goals, and not allow worldly conditions to discourage us from reaching them. 

Of course we won’t ALWAYS be happy.  We could encounter situations that make us very unhappy.  It is rather unavoidable because we are in this world.  But that should be the exception – not our status quo.   

I guess what I’m trying to say here, is that we have the ability, the right, and the freedom of directing our own lives.  We determine what goes in and stays in our own minds.  So, if we want our status quo to be happy, we can achieve that by the way we think.  Is the glass half empty or half full?  Can a silver lining be found?  Can lemonade be made from the lemons?  The answer is  — with God, nothing shall be impossible.  Our status quo of being happy is available because of God’s ability to provide for us.  We can stake our lives on His promises.  We can make our ways His ways and make our thoughts, the thoughts of His Word.  When we do those things, our “existing state of affairs” will be based on God’s standard.  And the most remarkable thing about that is –  although God’s standard is an unchangeable truth, its application is totally individualized for each one of us.  God is a very personal God.  Because of the limitlessness of His love, God is able to treat each one of us like we are His only kid – (and He can even do that for all of us at the same time!)  It’s way bigger than our minds can comprehend, but it’s true.  We can live our lives with whatever we want our status quo to be by trusting God and allowing Him to work in our lives.  You want happy to be commonplace?  God can handle that.  You want peace?  God can supply that. 

So, after working this all the way through, I think that I would like to make thankfulness my status quo.  Being thankful opens the doors for both happiness and peace in our lives – and much, much more!  If we are thankful, we will recognize the things that are all around us to bless us.  We won’t miss the important things that go unnoticed by a thankless society.  We will see the beauty that is available because of God’s handiwork.  And we will appreciate the little things.  What a worthy endeavor it would be to make the status quo, the most common condition of our lives, one of continual thankfulness to God! 

Let’s try it and see what happens. 

Note to my readers:  I pray that the existing state of affairs in your life is one that blesses you and enables you to live abundantly.  Thanks for reading! 

I thought it might be time for another poem.  This one is a lighthearted look at how our minds work sometimes.  I hope you enjoy it. 

  I’ve lived with someone since who knows when
 We get along, but every now and then…
 She* makes me crazy by the way she thinks
 She’s fearful, selfish and her attitude stinks
 Her negativity brings me down
 Her criticism makes me frown
 Her fear impedes my day’s success
 I’m burdened by her laziness 
 I try to help her change her mind
 I speak God’s Word, but she declines
 My frustration, I cannot hide
 Why is she never on my side? 
 But then to her, a light breaks through 
 And she accepts God’s Word as true 
 The negative thoughts, she does replace
 With God’s words of love and grace
 When this happens, I do delight
 For it means that we no longer fight
 And the battle in my mind is won
 For my old self is overcome 
  
 *Pronouns may be changed as needed… 

Once we are born again we have the opportunity to think in a whole new way.  A way that supersedes the worldly negatives that try to defeat us.  A way that transforms our mind into a new creation.  The Bible calls it renewing our minds.  It’s a process of kicking out the old worldly thoughts and replacing them with new thoughts from God’s Word. 

Even though we are born again, we still live in this world, so there is an ongoing battle in our minds.  The Bible describes our minds in the terms; “old man” (our old worldly thoughts and actions) and “new man” (our new Godly thoughts and actions).  These two thought patterns are polar opposites and at war with each other in our minds.  It takes our deliberate decision to choose which pattern we are going to follow. 

This is a lifelong process.  It doesn’t have to be difficult, but it does take consistent awareness on our part. The world demands our attention and floods our senses with information daily.  Therefore, worldly thoughts can creep into our minds despite our best efforts.  But if we remain vigilant to first recognize wrong thoughts, then to refute and replace them; we will have victory in our minds.  The benefit of not permitting negative thoughts to dwell in our minds is fairly obvious.  Negative thoughts like fear are completely debilitating.   And thoughts like having a poor self-image tear us down.  Those kinds of thoughts stop us from being the people we really want to be.   

Psychologists know that correcting bad behavior requires replacing it with good behavior.  As parents, we have witnessed this many times.  Telling a child to stop doing something without offering a corrective action, doesn’t always deter them.   The same is true for our minds.  We must purposefully direct our thoughts toward the positives of God’s Word in order to oust the negatives.  But our minds, just like an unruly child, might try to defy us.  These are the times we must ‘extra-actively’ pursue the true words of God.  And we must steadfastly hold on to those words in our thoughts and allow their light to dispel the darkness. 

The world is full of self-help books designed to aid people in ridding themselves of detrimental thinking.  These books utilize some of the principles of renewing the mind, so they can have a modicum of success.  But they lack the real strength of God’s words to keep the negatives at bay.  The Bible is the only sure-fire way to overcome the negatives of the world. 

All the positives of God’s Word have been freely given to us to enjoy.  All God’s promises are true and certain.  God loves us completely and eternally.  We are His children.  Why not think those kinds of thoughts instead of the bitter and unsettling ones that the world throws at us?  Why not see yourself as someone that God truly loves instead of the degrading picture that the world paints?  Knowing God’s Word arms us with so much more than merely “the power of positive thinking”.  God’s Word gives us the ability to discern truth from error and gives us the stamina to persist and win the battle in our minds. 

I heard liberty defined once as, “one’s right to choose for himself”.   We have the liberty to think what we want to think.  Why not think God’s Word? 

Note to my readers:  Remember – no matter what negative thoughts come your way, the light of God’s Word dispels any (and all) darkness!  Thanks for reading!

Recently, the soap dispenser that matches the faucet at our kitchen sink broke.  A replacement was easily found, but the installation of it was quite another story.  The difficulty arose from my trying to maneuver myself around the center post of the cabinet doors under the sink.  After uncomfortable contortions and much frustration, we did complete the task, but it took a team effort by my husband and me.

Sometimes, what we think is going to be a simple task, might not be so easy at all.  And it might require teamwork to accomplish.  In this particular situation, a nut had to be secured from underneath the sink around the pipe that holds the dispenser in place.  Simple?  Sure.  Easy?  No, not really, because of the center-post obstacle.  So it is with situations in life from time to time.  Unexpected obstacles may hinder our accomplishments. 

We may encounter situations in life that are downright hard or ones that should be simple but are not.  How do we handle those situations?  The best way is by teamwork! 

You may be thinking, ‘I don’t need a team for everything I do’.  Well, I guess that depends on who is on your team.  First and foremost you should have God on your team.  Think about it, if you owned a Major League Baseball team, wouldn’t you choose the strongest, smartest, most capable players to be on your team?  Who is stronger, smarter or more capable than God?  (NO ONE!)  So why not recruit Him for your team?  Wouldn’t God’s love and support make any task you do more palatable and successful?

God declares repeatedly in the Bible that He cares for us.  His care is as infinite as His love – they go hand in hand.  If God loves so much that He gave His only begotten son for us, and His love is demonstrated by His care, how great is that care??  Immeasurable!  All of this is to say that God cares as much about the little things in our lives as He does about the big things. 

Sometimes, we might feel like we shouldn’t bother God with our small inconveniences.  Not so.  God is our Father, and He cares about everything in our lives.  I often compare our relationship with God to a parent and a newborn infant.  A newborn is helpless and vulnerable, which stirs the most tender compassions in us.  In addition, we recognize how limited a newborn’s abilities are compared to our own, so it’s easy to see that we are needed. 

Like the great old hymn says, “Thou changest not, Thy compassions, they fail not”, God is full of compassion, kindness and mercy.  And I’m pretty sure that God recognizes the disparity between our abilities and His!  He knows that we need Him.  And He wants to take care of us.  Our day by day lives are greatly enriched by including God on our team.  No matter how grave or how insignificant our challenges might be, God is ready, willing and able to assist us in all of them. 

Now, let’s consider another aspect of teamwork – being a teammate.  Chances are that we have more than just God on our team.  Our family, friends and fellow Christians are almost always on our team and willing to help and support us.  But that also means that we should be on their teams.  We cannot expect people to help and support us all the time and give nothing back.  Our lives cannot be all taking and no giving.  That is self-defeating.  We should keep our eyes open for opportunities to be good teammates and lend a helping hand whenever possible.  And when we do that, a wonderful thing happens – we receive back.  This principle applies to more than just tithing.  It works for all giving.  Giving of ourselves, giving our energy, giving our time, our efforts, our support, our care and our love.  We are never poorer for giving these things away, we are always richer because this is a Godly principle.  Now don’t get me wrong, we do not give in order to receive, that would be selfish.  We give freely from our hearts without requiring anything in return (no strings attached). That is true giving.  And that opens the door for this principle to flourish in our lives.   

Think about how you would want that baseball team of yours to perform.  First, no egos getting in the way.  Then the team should work together for its success.  The team should follow the coach’s instructions. They all should participate using their best efforts.  They should acknowledge each other’s strengths.  And they should pay attention to each other so that they can be at the right place at the right time.  That is the most advantageous way for teammates to act and that’s what we would want for our team, right?  But stop and think… Is that the way we, ourselves act as teammates?  If not, we may be missing out on opportunities to bless and be blessed. 

So, teamwork in life basically boils down to relying on God, listening to His instructions, and loving one another.  Let’s seek possibilities to be the bless-er instead of focusing on ourselves.  There is no doubt that times occur when we need to be the bless-ee, but in between those times, why not look for every chance you can to be a stellar teammate?  Trust God to take care of you, and as freely as He gives to you, give freely to others.  I bet you’ll find that being the bless-er is even more fun than being the bless-ee!  And we must never forget; “you and God make a majority”.   So, even if He is the only one on your team, you still have a winning combination!  It just takes teamwork! 

Note to my readers:  I’m so glad to have you on my team!  Thanks for reading.

As promised, I am recognizing fathers in this week’s blog.  Fathers are an important part of the family.  They are the underlying strength of the family unit.  Mothers are strong and capable, but even the strongest mom relies on the strength of her husband in certain situations. 

A dad’s job can be tough.  He must be brave in every situation (especially ones involving spiders or snakes).  He must be strict without being unjust.  He must firm without being harsh.  He must be kind without being a push-over.  He needs to be the shoulder for everyone to cry on even if he feels like crying himself. 

I lost my dad last year.  He was 95.  He was the smartest guy I knew.  One time my son had an intricate math problem that involved adding numbers and reciprocals to get a palindrome.  After working extensively on the problem, we asked my dad for help.  So he wrote a computer formula to solve the equation.  And that was long before Excel!  He taught himself the play the organ by utilizing the mathematics of music.  And he was a pool-shark by using geometry. 

My dad was old school.  I grew up in an era when ‘children should be seen and not heard’.  There was one television, and when dad was home, we always watched what he wanted.  (I grew up watching a lot of westerns!)  He didn’t read me bedtime stories or hold my hand when I was sick (that was my mother’s job).  But he did fly from New York to Pittsburgh with a big lime-green stuffed elephant on his lap because I was in the hospital.  Both Dad and “Jumbo” were waiting for me when I woke up after surgery. 

If you read my “Mothers” blog, you may remember that I said we visited both sets of grandparents each summer.  Two of my favorite memories of my dad took place while visiting his parents in New Hampshire.  My grandfather had a two-room fishing cabin on his tree farm back in the woods next to the creek.  I thought it was such a special place.  There was no electricity, and the only water came from a hand-pump at the kitchen sink.  There were two twin beds, two living room chairs, an eating table, and all the necessary kitchen provisions.  Oil lamps offered the only light, and the woods supplied the other necessary facilities.  I used to pretend it was my house and I would play there often.  I wanted to spend the night there too, but I was afraid to do it by myself.  So one night, my dad stayed overnight with me.  It probably wasn’t the most comfortable night’s sleep for him, but he did it for me anyway.  I was elated! 

A few years later brought the advent of color TV, and my grandparents had one!  That year I anxiously awaited our visit so I could watch the “Monkees” in living color.  Fortunately for me, our visit was earlier than usual that summer.  I was so excited when I saw the show in color, that my grandpa offered me deal. He said if I could get my dad to go with me in the ocean, in June, in NH, over our heads, that he would give us the TV.  Now if you know anything about the ocean in New England in June, you know that the water is FREEZING cold at the time of year.  But my poor dad helped me seal the deal and we got our first color TV!  I actually had to ride all the way home (about 16 hours) in the back seat of a Volkswagen Beetle with that TV, (and they were big in those days), but I never complained! 

I will always remember how handsome my dad looked in his tuxedo when my husband and I got married.  I remember the times that I made him laugh.  And I remember the times that he would look over the top of his glasses at me – that’s when he really meant business – and sometimes meant that I was in trouble!  As I write, more memories flow through my mind and warm my heart.  My dad was a good man.

I can’t talk about fathers, without talking about grandfathers as well.  I had wonderful grandfathers.  They were quite different, but each had their own special qualities. 

My dad’s dad was the quintessential grandpa.  He looked like Santa minus the beard.  And he treated me like a princess.  He did puzzles with me, played games, and he taught me things like using a drill press and driving a car, both when I was around 10 years old.  My favorite game was King Kong and Fay Wray.  In this game he would be King Kong and carry me (Fay Wray) around the house with all the sound effects.  Then he would drop me on the couch and the airplanes would shoot him dead and he’d fall into a chair.  We played this game many times until I got too big for him to carry around.  I loved it!   He kept a jar full of silver coins in a little closet by the fireplace.  Whenever I did a good deed, he’d tell me I could go get a quarter or silver dollar out of the jar. You can be sure that I sought every opportunity to do good deeds!  (Too bad I didn’t hold on to those silver coins!)

Both my grandpas were a little ornery.  I say that because both grandmothers would roll their eyes at their antics.  My dad’s dad used to take his dentures out after dinner and have marshmallows for dessert.  He liked to chase them around in his mouth.  My grandmother would just shake her head and roll her eyes.  I would laugh and encourage him. 

And that brings me to my mom’s dad.  I called this grandpa, just “Pa”.

Pa was ornery in a different way.  He loved cars.  In particular, I remember his 1959 white Chevy Impala convertible with red interior.  I thought that was the coolest car that I’d ever seen, and I loved riding around with the top down!  Pa did the driving most of the time when we visited.  But Pa had a bad habit.  He would decide that it was his turn to go despite traffic indications.  Fortunately, we never got into an accident, but it was pretty close sometimes.  As a kid, I never recognized it.  But as I got older – it was a little scary! 

Pa had sayings. They were both silly and funny.  He would ask me where my slippers were every time that I was barefoot; and he’d ask what Tonto said.  Thinking back, in my early teens, I was less than kind responding to his questions, which I regret.  But as I got older, I appreciated his quirkiness.  He always called my grandmother, “my bride” and was totally devoted to her.  I can still hear her saying his name like he was a naughty child when he would say silly things.  It was part of their relationship that made them fun to be around.  Pa had great stories of the ‘old days’.  And he always gave bubble gum to servers as part of their tips.  He was a very likable guy.  I am proud to have his WWI Purple Heart Medal on display in my living room. 

All in all, I am very thankful for these men and the role they played in my life.  They influenced me in different ways and taught me many things.  I often wish that I could have talked with my grandfathers as an adult so that I could really appreciate and understand their experiences, wisdom, and advice from more than a kid’s perspective.  I would have loved to have written their life’s stories! 

And I am blessed to have had my dad in my life as long as I did.  Distance kept us apart physically, but he was always in my heart.  I have the utmost respect for the man he was. 

So this Father’s Day, think about what your dad or grandpas have done for you, and let them know (if you can) that you appreciate it.  Although dads may not show it like moms do, they too need to hear that you love them.

Note to my readers:  It has been fun taking this trip down memory lane.  I hope you enjoyed it.  Thanks for reading! 

Prayer is a rather common concept.   No matter what religion someone follows, they usually pray.  Christians are no different.  In fact, prayer is an integral part of a Christian’s life.

The dictionary calls prayer a reverent or devout petition to God.  And defines petition as a respectful or humble request.  Certainly, we can and do make lots of requests to God.

 But another definition of prayer is:  a spiritual communion with God as in supplication, thanksgiving, adoration, or confession.  I like this definition because prayer is so much more than just asking God for stuff. 

Prayer is an invaluable tool when times are tough.  In those times, we may try to figure things out ourselves; but how much better it is to call in the Expert!  When we don’t know what to do; what a relief it is to ask God for help!  And at the times when there is nothing we can do, our hearts rest in the assurance of the Almighty God’s undivided attention!

Prayer is also thanking God and praising Him.  And thanksgiving isn’t reserved only for answered prayer.    I often thank God just for listening.  He always does!  We can thank God before we receive our answer because we are confident that the answer is coming.  Of course, we shouldn’t forget to say thanks when our prayers are answered too.  And let’s also remember to praise God when everything is running smoothly.  (Sometimes we can forget about that one.) 

As far as confession – it’s not telling God how terrible you are or listing all the bad things you did.  It’s simply telling God that you’re sorry when you mess up.  And what’s really cool about that is that when you say you’re sorry (and mean it!), God forgets all about it.  He holds none of it against us. 

I share all of this because I want to tell you some news.  My husband got a job!  After almost 11 months, our prayers were answered, and he got a great new job.  And I thought that sharing our experience may help anyone who might be in a similar type of situation.

At the end of July last year, my husband was laid off due to the company’s lack of business as a result of the pandemic.  And this happened on the heels of buying a new home, moving to a new state, and my retiring.  Needless to say, at that time, the uncertainty of the future was a scary proposition.  At first, we were undaunted, thinking surely this situation wouldn’t last long.  We thought this would be a little vacation.  But as the months began to stack up, it became a little more difficult to remain positive.  However, when doubt would arise, we would do our best to keep it in check.  We had some money saved, but that was supposed to be for later, not now.  We learned to be more frugal, but we never stopped living our lives.  We paid attention to our budget, but we didn’t live like paupers. 

And all the time, we prayed.  We prayed for ‘financial assistance’, which God aptly provided along the way.  We prayed for the best job that would not only meet our needs, but also would be agreeable.  (I didn’t want my husband to have to work someplace where he’d be miserable.)   And we prayed for God to bless us, so that we could bless others.

The challenge in these types of situations is to remain patient and not become complacent. I have to admit that I had my moments!   But my husband was a trooper.  He would search the employment sites every day and apply to every job within his skillset.  He would get responses, even interviews, and then nothing would follow.  Until one day a colleague referred him for a job, and within a few days, my husband was reemployed! 

When I look back on this situation, I remember the many thoughts that I had to battle in my mind.  And I’m sure my husband was wresting with the same thoughts.  Things like being anxious, discouraged, jealous, resentful, worried, confused, doubtful or afraid.  We can’t always keep these thoughts away from us, but we can stop them from lingering in our minds.  Kick them out as soon as you can catch them!  And don’t beat yourself up for momentary negative thoughts.  Those thoughts are like the ants that slip into our houses through the tiniest cracks.  We are not failures for having those thoughts, we are successes for refuting them! 

God’s handiwork is apparent in these situations.  How do you survive when your income doesn’t cover your expenses?  How do you stay positive after so many let-downs?  How do you help someone else when you’re hurting?  By trusting God in prayer and allowing Him to provide for you.  The Bible says, “casting all your care upon Him for He cares for you.”  (1 Peter 5:7)  When we do this, we allow God to work for us and supply His solution.  Our minds may tell us that we can’t wait for God’s solution or that our own solution is necessary.  But if we patiently and continually pray and believe that God will provide, He will.  Don’t settle for second best.  His solution is always better than anything we could come up with!  Just because we don’t see a prayer answered right away does not mean that God isn’t working for us!  It is often a matter of timing, hence the necessity for patience.

If you are facing a similar situation in any category of life, take time to pray.  Ask God for His solution.  Thank Him for His care and concern.  Praise Him for loving kindness.  Ask all your friends to pray and believe with you for your deliverance.  (So many wonderful people were praying for us!)  There is power in prayer; and edification knowing that others are standing together with you.  There is also a great wave of rejoicing when you’re able to share your victory with them.

We never have to beg God.  We simply pray with believing because we have seen what He has already done.  The Bible is full of examples of what God is able to do.  And I’m sure we have seen His blessings in our lives or in the lives of others many times.  This current situation is not any different.  I often tell myself, “If God can do that… He can certainly do this.”  Our confidence is in God; and we refuse to accept any 5-senses evidence that is contrary to His promises.  Remember, “you and God always make a majority”!

Stay faithful to prayer.  Believe that God will do what He said He will do.  Don’t be so proud as to not allow others to help you.  They can be inspired to bless you, allow them to give, especially in prayer.  Be patient and confident.  God is a loving Father who wants to take care of His kids. 

Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.    Hebrews 4:16

Note to my readers:  I hope if you are in a similar situation that this was helpful and blessed you.  I pray for everyone who reads my blog.  And I rejoice at your victories.  Thanks for reading! 

“Right” is a prominent word in our vocabulary.  It has multiple connotations.  We use it in a myriad of ways.  Think about it…  “The socks need to be turned right side out”; “I have a right to be here.”  “That is the right answer.”  “Turn right at the next stop sign.”  “I’ll be right home.”  “You are right at the top of my list.”  Those are just a few examples.  We use the word regularly in lots of contexts.  Generally though, we think of right in three basic categories:  Right and left, right and wrong, and rights and privileges.  

Right and left basically denote bearing in relation to the right or left side of your body.  It can mean location or direction.  But all in all, I think right and left are pretty self-explanatory, so I won’t elaborate on that category. 

Rights and privileges are a hot topic in the world today.  There are moral rights, legal rights, inalienable rights, God-given rights, etc.  And it seems like everyone is arguing about the validity of all of them.  Since this is a political squabble, I’m not going to talk about that category either. 

BUT…

I do want to talk about right and wrong.  Right and wrong convey several different things to our minds. In school, the answers on the test were either right or wrong – correct or incorrect.  In conversation we might say either the right thing or the wrong thing – proper or improper.  In life we can make the right choices or the wrong ones – good or bad.    

For the most part, people want to do the right thing.  And they want to be right in the way they think.  It’s an innate heart’s desire.  However, all of us make mistakes, we get duped, or just show a lack of judgement.  But usually, we hate the times when we stray from right and endeavor to get back on the “right track” as quickly as we can.    

This brings up an important point – how do we know what is right or wrong?  There is only ONE sure standard that we can use to answer that question, and that is God’s Word.  God set up the only absolutely right way of thinking and acting.  So our thoughts and actions must be measured against that standard.  That is not to say that we have to recite Bible verses all day long.  It would be pretty hard to function in our daily lives if every word or thought had to be a scripture.  How would we do our jobs or even cook dinner?  But when we make the Bible our only rule of faith and practice, our conscience is guided by Its truth and that truth becomes our habit pattern of thought. 

I think of it like this:  Picture a compass…  North, East, South, and West, and all the degrees between.  Our moral compasses have corresponding settings:  “Right” being north, and “Wrong” being south, and all the degrees in between.  We try to keep our lives focused on Right, (north) and avoid Wrong (south).  But mostly we live our lives somewhere in the degrees between – hopefully close to north!  When we set true north on our moral compass to God’s Word, that becomes our guiding light.  And we can utilize that compass point to keep us on the “right road”. 

So, we all probably agree that we do want to do the right thing.  Our hearts generally lean toward helping one another, being of service, and giving to those in need.  We like feeling that what we are doing is helping people and making them happy.  It is rewarding to aid someone in a tough time and see them get through it.  It is very satisfying to be able to be strong for someone when they’re down.  But sometimes we get hurt.  Maybe our efforts to help are not appreciated or wanted.  Maybe we are ignored or pushed away.  Maybe we fail.  Maybe people take advantage of our generosity.  Many things can discourage us from doing what is right.  Hence, we end up in the degrees.  We may even determine that we are not going to help anyone ever again.  But then we see on our compass that we’re headed off course, and we can correct our thinking. 

It stands to reason that the further away from right we get, the closer we get to wrong.  (makes sense, right?)  But it doesn’t matter if we are as wrong as wrong can be, God always provides a way back to right, if we want it.  Again, let’s think of our compass directions.  If we are at the north pole (right as rain) and we start heading south, we will eventually get to the south pole (simply wrong).  But whatever direction we head from the south pole goes north.  And eventually, if we keep moving, we’ll reach the north pole again.  Isn’t God wonderful! 

As I stated before, the only sure measure of right or wrong is God’s Word.  Allow that Word to be your North Star.  You can always navigate by that star even in the darkest night.  Continue your quest to do the right thing regardless of any ingratitude.  And keep your thoughts on true north on your compass. 

You have the right to be right, right now, right where you are! 

Note to my readers:  You are right at the top of my list!  (I meant that!)  I will not be posting next Friday. However, I will post on the Friday following.  Have a wonderful two weeks!! 

I have been thinking about aging – getting older.  Getting older is not the same as getting old.  Everyone, even an infant, is getting older day by day.  It’s a natural growth process.  It’s the way of life on this earth.  And we accept that.  We even embrace it until we reach a certain age, then we tend to protest against it. 

Regardless of what age we are, so much about getting older is perspective and attitude. I would say it is totally about that, but I have a mirror.  There is no denying that I don’t look the same as I did when I was a kid or even as a young adult, so I know that there is definitely a physical side to aging.  Our physical bodies do show signs of age and they do wear out in time.  Things wrinkle, things sag, things no longer work the way they used to.  That is the physical side of getting older.  But getting old is definitely an attitude.

We cannot change the aging process.  But we can monitor our attitude.  People can be old at 40 if they think they’re old.  And people can be young at 80 because of their attitude.  Of course, we can help our attitude by taking care of our physical bodies, but even someone who is in good physical shape can sabotage themselves by negative thoughts.  And someone who isn’t so physically fit can be full of vim and vigor because of their positive thoughts.  

And perspective?  That’s readily identifiable.  I look at my granddaughter who is about to turn 21.  She is so incredibly young and innocent.  But when I was 21, I was very mature and wise (at least that is what I thought at the time!)  Perspective!  Neither observation is completely accurate, but we form these opinions based on our perspective.  To a younger person, someone ten years older than they are, is ancient.  To an older person, someone 10 years older is a peer. 

Think about childhood.  Young children are blissfully ignorant of the aging process.  They are never worried about the future.  Each day to them is an exciting adventure.  Their responsibilities are few.  Their enjoyment level is high.  Their anticipation of the future is bright – so much so, that often they don’t want to sleep because they’re afraid they’ll miss something.

Then children get a little older and they’re ready for school.  This may begin their awareness of the aging process.  They go to kindergarten, and they’re told that next year they will go to first grade, then to second grade and so on.  They start to grasp the idea that they must have another birthday before they can get to the next grade.   So they are filled with anticipation for their birthdays (and birthday parties).  This leads to children wanting to be older.  Ask a 9 year old his age, and if his birthday was longer ago than yesterday, he will probably say, “I’m 9 ½“.  Being older is a badge to be proudly worn. 

It seems once children reach a double-digit age, the quest to be 13 begins.  This age represents a rite of passage into becoming a grown up.  Being 13 means that they are a teenager, which is not only a source of pride, but also the onset of obtaining independence which unfortunately is also the onset of a lot of struggles for the parents.  Following shortly after 13, is the almost consuming desire to be 16.  Driving is the pinnacle achievement for a teenager’s freedom.  However, this is followed quickly by wishing for the magic age of 18.  Eighteen is marked by well-deserved accolades for accomplishments like graduating from high school, going to college, or preparing for a career.  It is also the age of reveling in independence, feeling invincible and being sure that all knowledge and wisdom has now been attained. 

A few years later, another milestone is achieved, which is 21.  Children are now adults.  They have finally arrived.  The world is their oyster.  They are no longer subject to the confines of parental rule.  They call their own shots now.  They will show everyone how life is really supposed to be lived.  Thus, childhood ends.

After reaching 21, however,  something changes.  There are no more age-milestones that need to be achieved.  Adulthood has arrived.  And now the aging process starts to be reckoned by decades.  You are now in your 20’s, and you’ll soon be in your 30’s and so forth.  And as you get older, you recall your life the same terms.  “I remember when I was in my 30’s…”  Another result of this 10-year age reckoning is that you sometimes stress about that birthday that ushers in a new decade.  Forty seems so much older than 39, while 41 isn’t much older than 40 at all.  Attitude and perspective! 

Something else remarkable happens during this time – the decades begin to fly past in a blink of an eye.  Just yesterday, you were in your 20’s and now you’re in your 50’s.  How did that happen?  How did all those years pass so quickly?  Where did they go?  Just a few years ago when you were 17, the year it took to become 18 was an eternity.  And each school-year that you lived seemed to drag on forever.  But nowadays, it’s January, then it’s Christmas and then it’s January again before you know it. 

Getting older is going to happen.  It’s the way of life.  But it’s what we do in our minds that makes all the difference.  Being a Christian is the greatest aid we have for positive thinking.  Knowing that we’re saved and going to heaven takes the edge off getting older because it eliminates the fear of dying.  We also know that God is able to provide for us and heal us no matter how old we are.  So, what’s a few more decades?  Being born again fills us with life-giving spirit that can energize our bodies regardless of our age.

I think of it like this…  Age is merely a number.  I am the age that I am.  I can’t change that.  God made the law of time.  What I can change, however, is my attitude.  Even if my body feels older than dirt, I can still feel young at heart.  I can still believe that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.  I can determine to hold on to those thoughts rather than listen to my body’s constant complaining.  I’m not careless to think that I haven’t aged.  I recognize my physical limitations.  (I can’t do back bends and splits like I used to; and I’m not shocked when I look in the mirror – most of the time.)  But I don’t have to let those limitations drag me down.  I can be vibrant and blessed if I choose to be so.

 Kids are always yearning for time to pass, while adults are often yearning for time to slow down.  Kids wish to be older.  Adults wish to be younger.  It’s a fairly universal condition.  However, no amount of yearning or wishing changes time’s progression.  The best thing we can do for ourselves is enjoy right where we are, today. 

Right now, exactly where I am, is where all those decades have transported me.  All the good years and all the bad years have culminated in today.  I can’t change the past and I don’t know what the future holds.  So, I might as well learn to live life to the fullest today.  Because, before I know it, today will be yesterday and I won’t be able to change it.  With God’s help, we all can grow older grace-fully.  (think about it)

I have been young, and now am old; yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging bread.   Psalm 37:25

Note to my readers:  The best part about getting older is all the friends that the years have provided.  Thanks for reading!

Having just celebrated Mother’s Day, I spent some time remembering my mom.  She was a good mom, kindhearted and understanding.  She was unbiased and non-judgmental.  I was raised to never judge a book by its cover; and taught that there are always two sides to every story.

My mom was quirky, which I never really appreciated until I was grown.  And she was opinionated, which trait I inherited – come to think of it, I inherited both of those traits (just ask my husband!).  She was Christian but didn’t often go to church.  However, she did her best to be a good person and encouraged me to be the same.

I remember one particular Mother’s Day when I was around 12 years old.  I had saved my money and purchased a teapot for my mom’s special day.  Now, mind you, this was in the 60’s – the teapot was dark olive green with an apple on the lid for a handle, and an apple motif on the front of the pot.  I thought it was the most beautiful teapot in the world and I was excited to give it to her.  I remember this gift so vividly because, on that Mother’s Day, I woke up covered in hives from head to toe due to an allergic reaction.  My entire body was bright red.  My eyes were nearly swollen shut, my face was distorted, and my feet were so swollen, it hurt to walk.  But I hobbled down the hall to my mom’s bedroom (she was having breakfast in bed) and presented the gift to her.  She cried.  Not because of the gift, but because of me.  It hurt her heart to see me in such a state.  That demonstration of love and concern made an impression on my young mind, which I have never forgotten.  My mom had that teapot on display in her kitchen all of her days.  She passed away nearly 30 years ago, and I still miss her. 

I also had two wonderful grandmothers.  They were as different as night and day, but each was uniquely special to me.  I called them both, “Grammy”.  And they both lived in New England.  Our summer vacations were always spent visiting them, my dad’s parents first, and then my mom’s.

My dad’s mother was rather old fashioned.  She wore her hair in a bun, dressed in a style from decades before I was born, and she always wore a hat when we went out.  They lived in a big house on a tree farm.  I have fond memories of picking green beans with her in their garden – I ate as many as I put in the basket.  And I still love raw green beans!

Every year, Grammy would take my mom and me to town to go shopping.  This was always a highlight of our visit.  Each year she bought me a new dress and a new doll.  I loved these shopping trips, not just because I got presents, but because it was a lady’s day out and I was part of it.

There were always Eskimo Pies for me in their giant chest freezer in the pantry.  (The pantry was a whole room off the kitchen.  My mom’s pantry was a little closet so of course, I thought my grandmother’s pantry was extraordinary.  In addition to the treasure-chest freezer, there were shelves of food and kitchen gear, and my grandmother’s wringer washer, which she rolled out to the sink when she did laundry.  She was the only person I knew with one of those and the process of using it to wash clothes fascinated me.)  If I ate all my dinner, Grammy would tell me that I could get an Eskimo Pie, so off to the pantry I’d run!  The freezer was so big and deep that I would often have to get a stool or something to stand on to reach my treat.  But you can be assured that I found a way to get one every time.  That was probably a little test of my ingenuity, which was likely my grandfather’s idea, but I rose to the challenge.

My mom’s mother was trendier.  She wore her hair and dressed in the style of the current day.  They lived in an apartment in town.  Grammy read with me and told me stories.  I can still hear her voice.  She also listened to my music.  But I never thought she minded that because really, who didn’t love the Monkees? 

During our visits, we went out almost every day.  There were a few restaurants that were always on the agenda, an old factory that was turned into a shopping outlet, other family, and of course, the ocean!  Grammy probably needed a week to recover after our whirlwind stays! 

During our visits, my parents and grandparents often played Bridge in the evenings.  I never understood the game, but they had fun and I could watch whatever I wanted on TV (a win-win).  It was usually ladies against the men, so the competition was lively.  One night, after having been on a losing streak, my mom and grandmother wore hats to the game for good luck.  They won that night.  So the next night, my dad and grandpa came to the table wearing hats.  I actually don’t remember, but the men must have won that night, because the next night they all wore hats!  Everyone laughed a lot, including me. 

I have so many sweet memories of these 3 ladies who influenced me.  And I am thankful that they were part of my life.  From a daughter’s / granddaughter’s point of view, they were great ladies who each left something of themselves in me.  And from a mother’s / grandmother’s point of view, I aspire to do the same for my children and grandchildren.

A mother’s nature is generally nurturing, which fosters a strong connection between her and her children.  For example, little children most often want their moms when they get hurt.  Older children confide in their moms rather than their dads when they have a problem.  And grown children, after they have their own children, realize what a labor of love their moms provided. 

A mother typically is also unselfish, putting her family’s needs before her own.  She will stay up late even when she is tired to make sure that her family is well cared for.  She will give her child the last piece of cake, even though she was dreaming of having it all day.  And if money is tight, a mom will opt for that toy her child wanted rather than the bracelet she had her eye on.

A mother is many things.  But most of all, a mother is loving.  Her family is vitally important to her and her love for them is pretty much unconditional.  Oh, she can get angry and stay mad for a while, but that doesn’t change the love she has.  Even when her children are grown and live far away, she can still feel their tug on her heartstrings.   

All mothers fall short and make mistakes.  Yet our mothers still hold a special place in our hearts.  Even if your relationship with your mother is less than ideal; even if your mother doesn’t demonstrate all the qualities that you think she should, you still love her.  And whether you realize it or not, she loves you. 

We all are moving so fast these days that the niceties of life sometimes get left in the dust.  Having a day set aside to express thankfulness to our mothers is not a bad thing.  Most mothers don’t demand recognition, so it’s up to the children to slow down for a moment and say, “thank you” or “I love you”. Because even though she doesn’t demand it, a mother still needs to hear it.  If a mother never receives recognition or appreciation, her heart can grow weary; and it will eventually break.  But even a small gesture of genuine appreciation is greatly rewarding.

Being a mom, I can honestly say that an expression of appreciation doesn’t require a gift or a card or even a special day, although all those things are always welcomed.  A mother’s heart is easily melted by a kind word of gratitude.  An unsolicited phone call or even a text can make her day.  Regardless of how busy you are, take a minute to show your mom that she is loved.  And if you are blessed with having her close by, give her a hug – I guarantee you she will appreciate it.

Note to my readers:  I singled out moms for this post because of the recent holiday.  I know that dads are important too.  They’ll get their recognition in June.  God bless you. Thanks for reading,

I chose this title because years ago, I worked for a chiropractor.  And one of our favorite patients referred to us who worked in the office as, “womens”.  It has been an endearing idiom ever since. 

We ‘womens’ are sometimes our own worst enemies when it comes to our opinions of ourselves. We often think the worst of ourselves when no one else is thinking anything remotely like that.  We tend to criticize our own appearance, or performance; and even question our worth.  In our own minds, we magnify our failures; and we have a hard time forgiving ourselves.     

Have you ever had those kinds of thoughts?  Well, you are not alone!  We are all susceptible to this kind of thinking because we live in a world that promotes it.  BUT those thoughts are lies.  Worldly thoughts that tear us down are at cross-purposes with the Bible’s truth.  Therefore, they are lies.

The Bible instructs us to align our thinking with what It says.  And God says that women are precious, beautiful, industrious, trustworthy, strong, generous, kind, honorable, wise, praiseworthy, blessed, and virtuous. (Proverbs 31:10-31)   To think less of ourselves than that, is denying our rightful state that God credits us as having.

We always have two ways of thinking – our own critical negative opinions; or God’s view of who we truly can be and are.  (Pretty much polar opposites!)  And it all boils down to which way we choose to think.  We determine what thoughts we adhere to.  We can make up our minds to cling to the positives instead of hanging on to the negatives.  It’s our choice, and it takes consistent work to maintain. 

It is easy for our minds to fall into negative habit patterns because that thinking gets the world’s endorsement.  We are pummeled with information designed to bring us down so that we think we need to have whatever is being marketed to make us feel better.  For example, images of super-models can demean our opinion of our own appearance.  So we think we need all the make-up, clothes, accessories, exercise equipment, and diets that are being advertised.  And after we have purchased all of it, we might feel better for a moment – until we see the next super-model.  Then we need new and better things, which the merchants are all too happy to provide.  And the cycle repeats.  There is nothing wrong with buying any of the things listed above if you want or need them.  It is the motivation for getting them that can be problematic.  There is no question that a beautiful new dress can make you feel like a million bucks.  But what happens when you take it off?  Are you less than enthralled by what you see?  That is how the scheme works to keep you needy and willing to buy.

The truth is that the outside will never change unless the inside changes first.  I have seen absolutely beautiful women who have a poor opinion of themselves, be miserable and defeated.  And I have seen women with modest looks shine as lovely stars because they feel good about themselves.  The difference is inside, not out.

Appearance is just one example of how the worldly schemes can keep us downhearted.  Similar tactics are employed in many other categories as well.  And these tactics usually involve comparing ourselves to someone else.  Maybe we’re not as successful as our friend, or as talented, or as popular.  The worldly scheme talks us into feeling poorly about our own accomplishments instead of being happy for our friend’s success. We may find ourselves feeling jealous or resentful, which can work against our positive attitude as well. 

There are myriads of schemes that may trip us up if we don’t guard our minds.  Perhaps a callous comment, or thoughtless remark can resonate in our minds until we accept its consequences.  Harsh criticism or hurtful words can wound us to the point of doubting our own self-worth.  And painful experiences can send us into the darkened depths of our souls.

When we face any circumstances that cause us to feel badly about ourselves, we must stop, grab our minds, and remember who we truly are.  Each one of us is unique and has something unique to offer. There is not another person on earth who is exactly like you.  So if you don’t give it your best shot, there will be a gap that no one else can fill.  And we can’t give it our best shot if we’re tied up in knots feeling poorly about ourselves.

The Bible is clear about the importance of each and every one of us who believe.  The benefits of being born again and the promises in God’s Word enable us to be the absolute best we can be.  And they give us all the ammunition we need to fight against the schemes of the world that are designed to tear us down.  The virtuous woman is in the heart.  And when she lives in us, we certainly will be able to overcome the worldly negatives that do their darnedest to discourage us. And we will shine as lights in the world and in our own eyes! 

Our contributions may not change the world – but if we don’t make them, we’ll never know.

Here is a quote from my favorite Bible teacher:

“If believers ever again catch a glimpse of how dear, beautiful and important they are to the Father, it will transform their very lives.”   Dr. VP Wierwille

Note to my readers:  YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! 

People like to be together.  We like to congregate.  We are a gregarious bunch.  There is comfort in being together.  There is excitement in being together.  We need each other – we learn from each other, we help each other.

In the book of Genesis, after God made Adam, He said that it was not good that man should be alone.  So He made Eve.  And Adam and Eve were together, and they were together with God.  This was the foundation of togetherness.

Then Adam and Eve started having children and they were together as a family.  Then their children had children who had children and so on, so the earth’s population exploded, but they still were together.  However, as the number of people multiplied, they became separate families.  This was the natural progression as they became further removed from the original family. 

Ancient societies were developed by families being together and then banding together with other families to form groups.  This was not only what they wanted to do; it was necessary for their survival.  People traveled in caravans, they lived together in walled cities, they worked together in the fields. They were together because everyone’s help was needed to get the work done; and because there was safety in numbers.   

This brings up an interesting point.  From the beginning, it was God’s design that people be together, and be together with Him.  But all along the way, there was also an opposing force endeavoring to separate people from each other and from God.  The serpent beguiled Eve and as a result, Adam and Eve’s relationship with God was broken.  Then their family relationship was decidedly harmed by their son killing his brother.  And that was just in the beginning.  Evil has always opposed the ways of God and is still at work today.   

Now, after that brief history lesson, we move on to talk about what I really want to discuss, which is being together with each other. 

Usually, we learn about being together in our families.  Families provide a loving environment and a nurturing haven for children to learn and grow.  There is comfort and security in the family setting.  Families take care of each other and protect one another.   Surrounded by this kind of family atmosphere, children can thrive.  Then, when they’re grown, they can do the same for their family. 

Families offer a cornucopia of opportunities for learning about being together.  Think about it.  Our parents show us about love, care and concern, and giving by their example.  Often, we first learn about sharing with our siblings. (that can be a tough one!)  We learn to be considerate of others, we learn to be dependable, we learn to trust and to be trustworthy, and much more.  Of course, all these things can be learned outside the family unit, but how much better it is to learn in an environment of love with people who genuinely care about your well-being!

The best part about families is that they are dynamic.  People are constantly learning and growing.  And families manage to adapt to the changes and remain together.  When parents learn new things, they teach their children.  And children teach their parents as well.  As time passes family relationships change.  Children grow up, move out, and start their own families.  But they are all still a family.

BUT, as I mentioned before, there is an opposing force that would like nothing better than to destroy the family unit.  Ever since the time of Adam and Eve, the family has been a target for destruction.  Because of that, many families are torn apart nowadays.  People fall prey to circumstances that cause broken homes, overwhelming life pressures, fighting and resentment, and more.  All of which muddy the comfortable and secure family environment.  Consequently, the togetherness of the family becomes damaged or non-existent.  The good news is that God had a plan for that eventuality.  He is able to bring people into our lives to fill the gap if the family is missing.  Friends, teachers, counselors, etc., can provide care and direction that otherwise might be absent.

Even when we have a great family, togetherness doesn’t stop there.  Think of all the people you know outside your family who have influenced your life.  Friends come to mind.  We meet people and tend to bond with those with whom we have common interests or similar ideals.  And they become our friends. Friends expose us to new perspectives, ideas, and experiences beyond our family circle.  They broaden our horizons.  Friendships can become as close as family and sometimes can help us in ways our family can’t.  And the great thing about friends is that we can have as many of them as we want.  My mom always said that if you want a friend, be a friend.  So if you want a lot of friends, be really friendly!  And don’t we just love to hang out with a bunch of our friends?  We love being together and it’s even more fun if we can throw some family in the mix! 

We can have a million friends, but there will always be those whose souls connect with ours.  Those are our best friends.  They are a valuable and beautiful find.  I am privileged to have a few of them in my life and each one has an incredibly special place in my heart.  I think of them as sisters.  I love them as much (almost) as my own sister.  And I cherish our times together.   

Of course there are many other people who affect our lives.  Life provides situations for us to be together with students, coworkers, neighbors, teammates and hobby enthusiasts to name a few.  In addition to that, all kinds of people can touch our lives, maybe by a simple smile in the grocery store.  People might stop to lend a hand; or brighten our day with a kind word.  These brief encounters can leave their marks on our memories.   And the one thing that all these examples have in common, is being together. People like to be together. 

But having a loving family, great friends and all those other people, was not God’s grand plan for being together.  He wanted even more for us.  His plan from the beginning of time, was for us to be together with Him in His family.  God provided a family for anyone (and everyone!) who believes.  He opened the doors wide to His living room and invited all of us in.  He provided a family to those whose didn’t have one.  He gave us brothers and sisters who were not only family, but also friends.  He gave us a group that is stronger than any opposition.  And He is our heavenly Father now and for all eternity.  Together forever!

So, although we are guaranteed to be together with God in His family forever, we still need human companionship now.  We need our physical families, our friends, acquaintances, and especially our family of God.  We need to see each other’s smile and feel each other’s touch.  We need to hear each other’s voice.  We need to be together. 

Together is the best place to be! 

Note to my readers:  In our fast-paced society that has no time to be together, stop and find a minute of togetherness, even if it’s just a smile in the grocery store.