Last year at this time I reminisced about my mom and grandmothers. After all, Mother’s Day is supposed to stir those kinds of thoughts and it generally does for me. I’m thankful to have had my mom and grandmothers in my life and my mind is full of wonderful memories of them. But this year, I thought I’d talk about another mother who has been a positive influence on me; and that is my sister.
My sister is twelve years older than I. She got married when she was very young and moved away from home when I was only 5. This provided a unique relationship for us. She was not only my sister, but she was also like my mom because she was a “grown-up” while I was still just a kid.
My sister and her husband moved into an apartment that was not far from my elementary school. I remember walking up the hill after school to visit her. They lived on the fourth floor with no elevator. Of course that didn’t mean much to me as a kid, but they had their first child while living there. So, as an adult, I can certainly appreciate the impact of climbing all those stairs during pregnancy and carrying basket after basket of laundry (including cloth diapers) up and down from the basement, which was technically 5 flights of stairs. But my sister did it. And at that tender age, she managed to be a good wife and mother in a less than conducive environment.
When they moved into their first house, I occasionally visited on the weekends. It was a like a home away from home for me. There was structure, but there was also an element of freedom not found with mom and dad. During their time living in that house, their second child was born, another beautiful baby girl.
I have good memories of that house. One day while helping her with the chores, I asked my sister where babies came from. She told me that they came from seeds of love in our minds. That answer satisfied me at the time, but for a year or so, I thought I had seeds in my head.
Another vivid memory I have is learning to ride my bike in their basement. I didn’t have a bicycle until I was 10 and I thought it would be very embarrassing to be seen outside learning to ride a bike at that age. So I taught myself in their basement riding back and forth around the boiler.
My sister and her family moved to their second house and life was good until one day her husband was seriously injured in a boating accident. I was around 12 and didn’t grasp the severity of the situation at that time, but I knew that there was grave concern about the future of my sister’s family. During their father’s lengthy hospital stay, the two girls lived with us. Of course, being a 12 year-old, all I could think about was how those little girls followed me everywhere I went. (If you read my last post, you’ll see that I hadn’t quite learned to be unselfish yet!) However, one of my favorite memories of that time was my brother and I playing hide and seek with the girls. When they would hide and we would come to seek them, the older one would say things like, “Don’t look behind the couch because I’m not back here.” Of course, we would play along and look everywhere else before looking behind the couch. And if we took too long, the younger one would jump out and surprise us. They really weren’t too hard to find! 😊
The good news is that my sister’s husband recovered! He was able to walk and have a full life. (Praise God!) And my sister managed to be a good wife and mother through that devasting experience.
I have always thought my sister’s homes were beautiful – she has very good taste! And at their second house, they had a pool! During their time living there, my parents moved so we lived about 2 hours away. But after I turned 16, I could drive myself to my sister’s to visit. I was in prime sunbathing shape in those days and took advantage of the pool as often as I could. I remember one occasion of watching chipmunks popping their heads in and out of the stone wall next to the pool. It was hilarious and something that I had never seen before, or since. Too bad there weren’t cell phones in those days. I would have had a great video!
While they lived in that house, my sister and her husband were blessed by the birth a third beautiful baby girl. And interestingly enough, there is a 12-year span between my sister’s oldest and youngest girls, just like there is between my sister and me. I was already a senior in high school when that baby was born, so I didn’t see as much of her when she was little as I did the other two.
A few years passed and I got married and had my own kids. But my sister and I stayed close. We would often meet at our parent’s house for holidays and other occasions. I have the greatest picture of us and all six of our kids together – ages 2 to 23. There are also some great shots of my mom, my sister, and I in our 1980’s outfits and hairstyles! UGH!
I remember many times through the years that my sister and I laughed together. But there were also times that we cried together. She was there for me during a very difficult time in my life. She helped me with her wisdom and experience. I still seek her advice on many topics. We also share a love for God and His Word, which is an even stronger bond than blood!
Our relationship changed as the years passed. We are no longer the “grown-up” and the little kid. We are peers. As it always happens, an age difference that seems huge when we are young, seems to decrease as we get older. My sister and I are pretty much in the same stage of life right now; all of our children are grown, and we are both grandmothers. Well, she is also a great-grandmother, which I do not anticipate being for quite a while, so she is still the big sister! Although many miles separate us, we try to talk regularly, but if we miss the opportunity, we are still firmly planted in each other’s hearts. I am thankful that she is my sister.
Mother’s Day is officially set aside to honor mothers because of the importance of their role in our lives. Some folks see it as a commercial holiday. Others, like me, see it as a chance to recognize not only our own moms, but also others who have influenced us in similar ways. No matter how you see the holiday, why not take a moment to say thank you to the moms who have a special place in your life? I’m sure they would greatly appreciate it.
Note to my readers: Happy Mother’s Day to my sister! And to you, whether you are a mother, have a mother, know a mother, or love a mother, have a happy day on Sunday. And… Thanks for reading!
P.S. I will not be able to post next Friday as we will be away at our granddaughter’s college graduation. I’ll be back online on May 20th.